The Despair to Prayer Chronicles - Part 6

When I started this series, I indicated that I had spent a lot of time trying to compose a post about prayer, but nothing I wrote seemed quite right.

I guess God had to bring me through lots of tears and lessons to get to a point where the words would flow. If you haven't read the earlier entries, click here for part 5 which contains links to all the previous posts.

In this last entry, I want to take that look at the "mechanics" of prayer.

I  mentioned last time that I read Bill Hybels book To Busy Not To Pray.

One of the things he talked about was the acrostic A.C.T.S.  If you've been a Christian for any length of time, I'm sure you've heard of it.  It stands for Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving and Supplication (or requests).

Although I knew the acrostic, for a long time I confused the meaning and purpose of Adoration and Thanksgiving.  Bill talked about acknowledging God for who He is.  Omnipresent.  Omniscient.  Omnipotent.

That's when I began to realize that praising him is not the same as thanking him. 

Acknowledging who he is isn't the same as being grateful for what he's done.  

When you're sitting next to the vastness of the ocean, you begin to get a sense of how immense and complex and creative He is.  Can you even fathom counting the grains of sand on that one beach?  How about space and stars and galaxies...does your mind hurt trying to wrap itself around that enormity? 

Praise Him for He is glorious! 

When you have a more accurate picture of who you're going to in prayer it puts stuff in perspective.

If God created all of this - and holds it together each and every day - can He not handle whatever your problems are? He created you as well. Psalm 139 tells us we are fearfully and wonderfully made!  He formed us in our mother's womb and knew us before the beginning of time. 

He loved us with an everlasting love - can we do anything less than sit back on our heels in awestruck wonder...or fall on our faces in utter abandonment saying Abba Father, we adore you?  

As I began processing these thoughts I started to sing the words to an old, simple song of praise:

Father I adore you, lay my life before you, how I love you. 
Jesus I adore you, lay my life before you, how I love you.
Spirit I adore you, lay my life before you, how I love you.

Then another favorite came to mind:

Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, there's just something about that name. 
Master, Savior, Jesus like the fragrance, after the rain. 
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, let all heaven and earth proclaim...
Kings and kingdoms will all pass away, but there's something about that name.

Now that my heart was in a place where I could truly see His perfection, I also clearly saw many of my imperfections...and I began to confess them. 

Again, the book highlighted things in a way I had not thought of before. 

Bill tells a story of a congregant who came to see him to say he was tired of all this talk of 'sinning.'  As far as he was concerned, he wasn't a sinner.  Bill asked how long he'd been married.  It was a long time - something like 25 years.  Bill said, 'You mean to tell me in all that time you've never been unfaithful to your wife?  You have always done what is right?'  The man replied, 'Well, I'm in sales. You know, I'm on the road a lot.'  He laughed a bit nervously.  Bill said 'He didn't admit it outright, but we both knew what he was getting at.' Then he asked the man, 'Have you ever put down something on an expense report that you shouldn't have? Gotten credit for something that wasn't really applicable?' 'Everyone does' was the reply.'  'And what about the product you sell?  Ever enhance the benefits knowing it wasn't true just to make a sale?' 'That's just industry standard' he argued 'It's expected!'.  Bill looked at this "non-sinner" and said to him, you've just admitted to me that you are an adulterer, a cheat and a liar. 

The man looked shocked. 

'Say it out loud' Bill instructed.  'This is what you are - an adulterer, a cheater and a liar.' 

Wow.  Have you whitewashed your sins? I know I have. Are you just sharing stories or are you a gossip?  Are you  just venting or are you a constant complainer? Do you 'borrow' pens, paper, folders, any kind of office supplies from work? You're a thief. Ugly words, aren't they?  But sin is ugly. 

We have ALL sinned and come short of the glory of God. Instead of denying that fact, why don't you ask forgiveness for it and have it taken away?  Spend time each day asking God to search your heart.  When I'm aware of what I've done that needs confessing, I do...but I also ask that He would show me areas I may not even be aware of.

Now that my heart was lighter, I could truly give thanks. That week I started with thanking Him for the gift of the beach house, for my senses that allowed me to fully drink it all in - sight, sound, smell, touch - for the car that brought me down there, for the job waiting for me when I returned. For the friends who texted to say they were praying for me, for God revealing His love for me through my Bible and the writings of others. For every lesson He loving taught me through the birds, the shell, the consistency of the waves and the rising of the sun. 

The words of another song came to mind and I sang them too:

Give thanks with a grateful heart
Give thanks, to the Holy one
Give thanks for He's given Jesus Christ His Son. 
And now, let the weak say I am strong
Let the poor say I am rich
Because of what the Lord has done for us.  Give thanks.

Finally, I brought my requests to God. 

I prayed for my children to return to a right relationship with Him. I prayed for clarity and wisdom on a number of issues where decisions needed to be made. I prayed for the well-being of my friends - not in general terms, but mentioned each by name and lifted their specific situations to Him. I asked that He would guide my ministry, the leaders of my church, and those of our nation. There are always many requests, but with a heart that's been prepared, they don't take on such a 'give me' quality.

As I closed out my prayer time I thanked Him for His promises and His faithfulness to carry them out. 

I opened my Bible, read a few Psalms and sat back silently to listen to what He had to say. 

The words of Habakkuk 2:1 & 2 came to mind...I will stand at my watch, and station myself on the ramparts; I will look to see what he will say to me, and what I answer I am to give this complaint. Then the Lord replied: Write down the revelation and make it plain on tablets so that a herald may run with it.

So this is the conclusion of my journey from Despair to Prayer. I am writing it down and making it plain in the hope that you are able to glean something helpful from it. I pray that God speaks to your heart as clearly as He spoke to mine...I know He will if you seek Him.

The Despair to Prayer Chronicles - Part 2

Welcome to Part 2 of this 6 part journey I wrote exactly 4 years ago. If you missed yesterday's post, you can read it here.

If you did read yesterday's post, you'll recall I was in a "prayer desert", desperately in need of God's presence, but feeling far from it. That's where we pick up today...


Please note the title is "Despair to Prayer" - not "Despair to No Cares".  

Even as I write this, there are things going on in my life that are burdensome. I am in uncharted, possibly life-altering territory and if I'm going to make it through, I need to cling to God...hard.

Prayer isn't a magic pill you swallow that turns everything to sunshine and rainbows.

No, prayer is a lifeline that connects you to the One who holds you fast even in the midst of the fiercest storm.

It gives you strength and focus. It keeps you from drowning in a sea of despair.

I've heard it said 'the day you have no troubles is the day you wake up in heaven'.  We live in a fallen world with a real enemy who, even though he may have lost the battle for our souls (if we're believers), still intends to do everything in his power to keep us from living joyous, power-filled and victorious Christian lives.  He can't alter our future, but he can mess with our present if we allow him to.  Thank God we have this promise "greater is He who is in you, than he who is in the world."

Yesterday I said "all of a sudden, I found myself in the desert".  It's not that the trip into the desert was sudden, it was more the actual realization that my throat was parched and I had grit in my teeth that was kind of overnight.  Looking back, I see that things had been piling up, one by one.  That's always the way, isn't it?  Like the Casting Crowns song says:

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It's a slow fade...

I was burning the candle at both ends, and letting things fall through the cracks.  Before I knew it, I was so busy dealing with the squeakiest wheels, I had no time to slow down and hear the still small voice calling me.

The more I didn't pray, the more I didn't want to pray.

By the weekend before I left for vacation, I was physically spent, emotionally raw, and spiritually empty.

I went to church Sunday, but I didn't want to go in and sit down.  I saw a friend in the lobby and shared with her about this overwhelming sadness I couldn't explain, and how the big picture looked so insurmountable I didn't even know where or how to take my next step.

She asked if I'd been to the service yet, and I confessed I really wasn't sure I wanted to go.  "You need to hear it" she said..."he's talking to you right where you are."

I begrudgingly slipped into a seat in the balcony.

That Sunday was the 10th anniversary of 9/11.  The sermon was out of Habakkuk, and the message was about moving from despair to praise.

I wasn't ready to praise!

Instead, I walked out weeping.  Eventually, I tried to regroup and walked back into the sanctuary downstairs, not taking a seat, but standing where no one could see my red eyes.  On the screen flashed verses from Psalm 42.  Several times I read the words "Why are you downcast, O my soul?  Why so disturbed within me?"  That's when the tear ducts really opened up. Like the psalmist, I didn't know why, but I knew my soul was downcast.

I couldn't stand anymore. I turned on my heel and left.

That night, before I packed to leave for the shore, I called a friend.  I shared some of what I was feeling.  She gave me an assignment.  "You're going for 3 days, right?"  I confirmed.  "Okay...each day, I want you to read a chapter out of Habakkuk - there are only 3!"  She gave me some other instructions, and said she would be praying for me.

I hung up and set about the task of packing my bags, grateful to be going far enough away that I didn't have to deal with anyone I knew for a few days.

Tomorrow, the praying begins...

From Praise to Praise Revisited

The crowd sang hosannas on Palm Sunday, the disciples were ecstatic over a risen Savior on Easter Sunday...but in between was a week that got ugly. The crowds cried crucify him, the disciples hid.

When things look bleak, don't lose hope. When all appears lost, remember we serve a RISEN Savior!

From Praise to Praise

Palms laid down
On the ground
People join the joyous chant

Songs of praise
Hosannas raised
The King arrives triumphant

Passover meal
The deed revealed
Judas takes his leave

Anguished prayer
The cup He'll bear
All sin Christ will receive

Judas betrays
A kiss he lays
Upon the cheek of Jesus

Peter denies
Three times, then cries
He knows his sin is grievous



The guards mock
Chief priests lock
Forces against this man

Pilate abstains
The crowd complains
So he gives in to their plan

"Crucify Him"
"Crucify Him"
Replace last Sunday's praise

Whipped flesh torn
Crowned with thorns
Upon the cross Christ is raised

"Remember me"
Is one man's plea
Although the other scorns

"Into your hands"
The end, as planned
The temple curtain torn


Three days He's gone
And then at dawn
The stone is rolled away

No body here
Alive, it's clear
All praise this Resurrection day!

By Toni Campbell  All rights reserved

A Heart of Thanksgiving - A Repost

I noticed that suddenly, this particular post from a year ago has been getting a lot of attention.  Perhaps people are doing internet searches on thankfulness.  Whatever the reason, I thought on this Thanksgiving day, this post would be a good one to republish.  Acknowledging our thankfulness is a good thing, but once a year is simply not enough. Thankfulness should be a way of life, not just a holiday or occasion. As you contemplate the things you're thankful for today, consider this...

A few weeks ago I led the first monthly women's prayer group of the fall.  As we went around the room voicing our thoughts, concerns and desires, one woman shared a quote she'd just heard that morning.

"What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?"  

An eternity of silence followed as the weight of the thought rolled around our in brains.

How would you fare?  Would you wake up in a bed?  With a roof over your head?  Would there be food for breakfast?  Lunch?  Dinner?  Clothes on your back?  A car to drive?  A job to go to? 

Forget the possessions for just a minute...would you have family or be the only one around?  Would you have all your senses - smell, sight, hearing, taste...even touch?  A sound mind?  Body?

One person spoke up..."If we did that, we wouldn't ever have time to get around to anything else."  Bingo.  If we spent more time being thankful for what we do have, we'd have less time to petition God for what we think we need.

Don't get me wrong...things go wrong in a fallen world.  People lose their jobs, their health, their loved ones.  There is sorrow and pain, and we need to intercede for others on a daily basis.  Life is not one big feel good love fest by any means.

But...when we start out with a heart of thanksgiving...with praise on our lips...when we learn to appreciate all that we have, we are better able to look at God and not dwell on the problems. 

Like the saying goes, "Don't tell God how big your problems are, tell your problems how big your God is."  That's not a trite saying.  It is a powerful truth.  I know.

Right now, my son and I are dealing with several large problems, but our outlooks are completely different.  I don't know how he's come by this way of thinking, but he believes that God is too impersonal to care about the daily needs of two people out of the billions on this planet.  He has actually stated that he "doesn't think we're going to make it through the winter."  Even as we can clearly see the hand of God moving in the situation, my son is overwhelmed by what we appear to lack.

On the other hand, I am completely at peace.  I know I am powerless to deal with the issues at hand and have already given them over to God to deal with.  I am grateful for all I do have, trying not to take any of it for granted. I think on the verses which tell me that caring for me is EXACTLY what my big, yet personal, God does...He saw me formed in my mother's womb, He knows the number of hairs on my head, my name is etched on the palm of His hand, and He died for my sins so that I don't have to live an eternity apart from Him.

Yes, I want to thank God for that last one especially.  Without a grateful, accepting, heart for that sacrifice, it is hard, if not impossible, to be truly grateful for everything else.  

So here's the challenge at the close of this day:  "What if you woke up tomorrow with only the things you thanked God for today?"  Today is drawing to a close...think about it...make a list...voice your thanksgiving and praise before making your requests.  You might just discover there are far fewer things to ask for than you first thought.

On a Bench Facing West

On a bench facing west
it's answers she seeks
On a bench facing west
with her Father she speaks 

She lifts up her voice
both in grief and in praise
She lifts up her voice
endless days upon days

Her Father looks down
and He sees every tear
Her Father looks down
understands every fear

"My child" says He
"have patience, just wait"
"My child" says He
"I'm on time, never late"

"For these many long years
I've waited" says she
"For these many long years
for your answers to be"

"My dear daughter, I know
all your deepest desires"
"My dear daughter I know
to what you would aspire"

"I put the dreams there
in your mind and your heart
I put the dreams there
I've been here since the start"

"In Me you must trust 
I am faithful and true
In Me you must trust
what's best I will do"

"Now hush and just sit
in My Presence today
Now hush and just sit
I am making a way"

So she lifts up her heart
in quiet and peace
So she lifts up her heart
His Presence she seeks

On a bench facing west
she watches the sky
On a bench facing west
her Father is nigh

by Toni Campbell - all rights reserved