The Day I Shoplifted...

So the story begins...yesterday. Yes, my indiscretion isn't a skeleton from the closet of my younger days, it happened just 24 hours ago.





Most of you can probably relate to the way this whole scenario started. I headed into Walmart to buy some cat food, and wound up with way more stuff in my cart.

One of those items was the wicker basket pictured, although originally, it was empty. I stood in the store and played with some flowers, a few leaves, two gourds and a pumpkin until, tada! I had the masterpiece above.

"Masterpiece" might be a bit overstated, but you have to understand that while I love watching HGTV and design shows, I don't feel I have an "eye." I'm so envious of those who can put together patterns and colors or see the potential in a blank canvas. So to me, my little basket creation was a big deal. I was really happy with how it turned out!

Now, I didn't really want to spend the $10 it all came to, and it crossed my mind that if I waited a few days until after Halloween, it all might go on sale. But I have absolutely no fall decor in the house and we've already established that I had created a masterpiece, so I treated myself, put it in my cart and finished my shopping.

At the checkout, everything went on the conveyor belt. The cashier was putting just one or two items in each bag and I encouraged her to feel free to fill them as much as possible.

A customer behind me said "you sound like me! The less bags to carry inside, the better."

As she and I continued the conversation, out of the corner of my eye, I saw the cashier pick up the basket.

"Could you ring that up without dismantling it?"

It was an innocent request. I just wanted her to use the register "gun" to scan each of the items within the basket without removing them.

I turned my attention back to the other shopper until I heard "your total is $85.20."

Yikes! How did I manage to spend that much?

I swiped my card and headed for the door where a gentleman in a Walmart apron asked to see my receipt. I handed it to him, he glanced at it and then in my cart. He handed it back, and out the door I went.

As I drove away, I had a nagging feeling the cashier had not rung up all the items in the basket.

I started entertaining less than Christian thoughts...

"Well, if she messed up, I didn't really want to pay $10 anyway."

"The tags weren't hidden-it's not my fault if the cashier didn't catch it."

"I handed over the receipt, I'm in the clear."

When I got home, I checked the receipt. The basket was all that was on it. I knew I wouldn't be able to enjoy my little centerpiece creation until I had rectified the oversight.

Okay, so calling it "shoplifting" may have been a bit dramatic. After all, there was no intent to deliberately walk out without paying. But the bottom line is merchandise left the store without being rung up.

I was disappointed in myself. I had a suspicion it hadn't been rung up and I waited until I was home to check. My thoughts on excusing the oversight weren't very holy. And I knew the longer I waited to make it right, the easier it would be to dismiss the problem, so I never removed the basket from the bag after walking in the door.

Today, I went back into the store. I went to a cashier and said, "this is gonna sound weird, but...." and I explained what had happened. She looked at me a little surprised and said "God bless you. Most people would never come back to make this right."

She's probably right. Most people probably would have seen it as a $5 win. They would have made excuses on why it was silly to go back once the threshold of the store was crossed without detection.

But as Christians, we shouldn't be most people. We're held to a higher moral standard because we know Jesus. We know the one who is the Truth.

I'm not telling this story to say "hey look at how godly I was. I paid for something when no one would have been the wiser if I didn't."

I tell this story to say it's just that easy for the devil to try to trip you up. If he came up to us with horns and a pitchfork, we could easily spot him and get our guard up. But he doesn't do that. He's subtle. He tells you things are inconsequential. No one gets hurt. No one will ever know.

It's the oldest trick in the Book. He's been using rationalization since literally the beginning of mankind.

I have a friend and former co-worker named Joan. I consider her my "spiritual mother." She took me under her wing when I was in my mid-20s. She showed me the benefits of journaling, taught me through Bible study, and was just a wonderful example of being a godly woman. Joan had 7 children, several of whom were in the Navy. She wrote to them every day. When she made a decision to move across the country to California, she brought in a huge bundle of pens on her last day. When I asked what they were, she explained that often she grabbed a pen off her desk to write letters with during lunch. Sometimes she'd throw them in her purse. Now that she was leaving, she gathered them all to return to our employer. She reminded me that even though it seemed inconsequential, they weren't hers to keep and she was returning them to their rightful owner.

That was a lot of years ago, but that simple act of honesty made a huge impact on me.

So maybe I didn't deliberately shoplift, but I wouldn't have been able to fully enjoy my little basket if I hadn't gone and made things right.

It's important to remember that when no one else sees, God does. And not fixing the problem would have hurt someone...me.

"Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it."  James 4:17

A Way of Escape

Temptation.  It comes in all shapes and sizes.  It comes at us from every direction.  It comes when we least expect it.

Last Friday, the "God's Daily Promises" email I receive asked the question "How do you avoid temptation?".  It quoted this scripture: "She came and grabbed him by his shirt, demanding, 'Sleep with me!' Joseph tore himself away." Genesis 39:12 NLT. 

Sunday's message?  It was from this very same section of scripture, regarding temptation, standing firm even when no one is watching, and God providing a way of escape.

Just a hour or so later on Sunday afternoon, I was helping to provide a service for residents of a physical rehabilitation facility and once again, in the course of the message, temptation and a way out was referenced. 

The icing on the cake was my devotional on Monday from "Jesus Calling" which said in part..."Keep your eyes on Me!  Waves of adversity are washing over you, and you feel tempted to give up.  As your cicumstances consume more and more of your attention, you are losing sight of Me.  Yet I am with you always, holding you by your right hand.  I am fully aware of your situation, and I will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able to bear.  That devotional was taken in part from I Corinthians 10:13 which says:  "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man.  And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it."

It's always been my observation that when a 'theme' crosses my path, two, three, four times, esepcially in a short period of time, there's a message God wants me to take hold of.  As I come to the close of this 29 day fast, I can't help but think that the message is 'you'll be tempted out there...tempted to fall back into idolatrous patterns...but stand firm.  There is a way of escape.  The past 4 weeks you've had the strength to resist because you centered your focus on Me.  The path on the other side of this fast is no different.  Keep your eyes on me.  I am faithful.  I am with you always.  I am your way of escape.'

So, when March 1st comes around, how will I be different?  What discoveries have I made that will impact my walk going forward?   Here are just a few...

• I've learned some of my temptation triggers.  It is easier to avoid temptation than resist in the midst of it, so I need to practice being aware of where I am and what I'm doing. 
• More temptations compete for my attention than I realized.  It is easy to lose focus and I do NOT have the strength to do this under my own power.  I need God's power to stand firm. 
• I can only possess that power and use it fully when I am engaged with Him.  A regular time to meet with Him, talk, listen and absorb His Word is imperative and I will guard it fiercely. 

In 2 days, this self imposed fast will be over, but I will not be rushing to jump back into old routines.  There is a peace in handing over control.  There is a comfort in uncomplicating life.  There are still other idols to knock down.  But I know that when temptation rears its head, it's not an automatic defeat.  I have a way of escape.  The exit may not be easy to see or to access, but I have Someone to point the way.

The Chocolate Bunny Idol

Now that I've been on this 'fast' a full 10 days...a third of the way...I've made some observations.  There's not enough time for me to list - or you to read - all of them in one sitting, so I'll share one a day.  I give them to you in no particular order except to say that some don't seem to have any deep spiritual meaning on the surface, but still, I'm discovering strengths and uncovering weaknesses, so at least for me, it's all valid intel.

Observation number one:  I miss chocolate.  Period.  I don't believe we've ever been separated this long since...well, since we were first introduced - most likely in my toddler days..  And THAT was a very long time ago.

Chocolate and I, we have this love-hate relationship.  I love it, and it hates to see me smooth-skinned and thin.  Seriously though, stepping away from sweets has been the second most difficult thing I've done the past week and a half.  Wow...put in those terms it hardly sounds like the eternity I feel it's been!

On the other hand, while it is obviously a weakness of mine, I found that I have incredible strength.  As someone who loves to bake, chocolate is all over my kitchen.  In fact, in the past 10 days I have baked one of my 'famous' homemade chocolate cakes with homemade chocolate icing for someone's birthday, and a batch of sugar cookies garnished with caramel, white and dark chocolate and sea salt for another friend.
From those things I've taken not one taste.  Not a lick of the spoon.  "Don't torture yourself" I hear some saying..."purge your house of it".  I could do that, but life is wrought with temptations - big and small - and we cannot live our days in avoidance.  I need to be able to stare it in the eye and say, "God is in control of my life, not my desires".  If something isn't good for me, I need to learn to walk away.

Don't get me wrong...in 20 more days, I may in fact have a piece of chocolate.  But it won't be the over indulgence it might once have been.  For starters, I suffered through a 3 day headache as I literally withdrew from sweets.  That's a sobering situation.  Nothing should have such a hold on me that I have to have physical pain from it...that's an addiction.

I started this journey to remove some idols I saw being set up in my life.  Anything that reaches addiction status is an idol for sure.  Reminds me a little of that chocolate idol in Veggie Tales "Rack, Shack & Benny".  If you're not familiar with this classic, it's based on Daniel 3 - a portion of scripture that God has put "in my way" at every turn for a number of months now.  The story (short version) is about three of the Hebrew men taken into captivity by King Nebuchadnezzar.  They were given new names, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego.  The king created a 90 foot high image of gold that all were to worship, but these three men refused.  Word got back to the king and he summoned and questioned them.  They stand firm with these words from Daniel 3:16 - 18 "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter.  If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king.  But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."  Upon hearing those words, the king orders them to be thrown into a furnace which he has heated 7 times hotter than usual.  The men are tossed into the furnace - the heat so strong it kills those who throw them in - but 4 men are seen walking around in the fire unconsumed.  The king shouted to them to come out and is so impacted by how they have been protected, he warns everyone that if they say anything against the God of these men, that person will be killed.  

So I do miss chocolate, but I do not "love the bunny" enough to keep it an idol in my life.  I am willing to surrender that desire for one so much more important and life-giving...desiring after God.  Psalm 103:2 & 5 "Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits - who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's."