Gorillas & Mules & Fools - Oh My!

Have you ever wanted to get something off your chest?  Put it all out on the table?  Address the gorilla in the room?  You know it's something that might have consequences once the words are out there but at that very moment, you're convinced you don't care - you just want to speak your mind!

I'm not always good at muzzling my thoughts.  (Right now those who know me best are uttering a sarcastic "Nooooooooooo, really?!!")  I have been known on more than one occasion to speak out of impulse and emotion because I just couldn't STAND the injustice of the situation another minute!

Basically, I stink at waiting.  That's problematic since waiting is generally needed for discernment, because waiting is often required to hear from God. 

On those occasions when I do manage to wait, it's often not silently and reverently with an ear toward the whisper in the wind. No, I'm much more likely to become head of the debate team. 

Yes, I, mere mortal that I am, try to explain to the God of the universe (read: argue with) why I should act in a certain manner. Forget that I'm full of faults and my past behavior of being the fool who rushes in where angels fear to tread has caused me nothing but embarrassment, heartache, or a full belly of crow. This time will be different!

Such was the case for me recently. I wrote a response to an email that I really, really, REALLY wanted to send. I was chomping at the bit to make my thoughts known, but I was counseled by two friends not to send it. I tweaked it. I saved it. I re-read it. I tried to talk both myself and my friends into the validity of it. They disagreed. I tweaked it some more.

The next day, I did what I should have done in the first place. I prayed for wisdom and discernment.  My prayer wasn't exactly textbook holy...it kind of went like this: "Lord, you know I can be stupid...please speak to me clearly through your Word this morning so I know what to do."

Be careful what you ask for if you really don't mean what you say. The devotional I read talked about being silent before God.  Seeking His face for guidance. I read the accompanying scriptures which were along the same vein, but then I noticed the previous year I had written in another scripture passage. I must behave this way more than I realize.

Psalm 32:8-9 says "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you. Do not be like the horse or the mule, which have no understanding but must be controlled by bit and bridle or they will not come to you."

Did I mention I had been 'chomping at the bit' to send the email? 

I deleted it. 

There's a saying "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt." It's very close to Proverbs 17:28 which says "Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent, and discerning if he holds his tongue."

Actually, Proverbs has a lot to say about fools. In 18:2 we read "A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions" and in verse 7 of the same chapter it says "A fool's mouth is his undoing, and his lips are a snare to his soul." 

I'm sure if modern technology had been around in Biblical times the verses could just as easily have been written "A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in posting all his opinions on Facebook" and "A fool's keyboard is his undoing and his texts and emails are a snare to his soul." 

I don't know about you, but while I aspire to be many things, a fool is not among them. 

Words, whether spoken or written, can never be taken back. Once that "send" button is pushed, you may just be opening your mouth and removing all doubt as to your foolishness. Thank you Lord for answering my prayer with clear instruction and providing a second chance to act wisely!

DETOUR AHEAD!

I've finally realized something. 

Life is full of detours.

You're probably not shocked or surprised by my detour discovery, but I can be a little slow on the uptake sometimes.

Somehow, that big orange warning always catches me off guard. I'm riding along, everything going according to plan, when suddenly, the signs tell me I need to go a different way.

A way that I don't know. 

A way, that I suspect, is going to take me longer to arrive than I anticipated. 

But the way forward is blocked.

I have choices. I can be short-sighted and become frustrated and angry by the roadblock.  I can turn around and give up. Or I can trust that the one who put up the signs knows the lay of the land far beyond my limited scope. I can believe those detour signs will lead me to where I'm supposed to go.

So, I trust and follow the arrows.

Because the detour wasn't my choice, I view it as an inconvenience at best, and at worst, it's downright scary. The way can seem dark and winding. It often leads me deeper into unfamiliar territory.

But I continue to look for the arrows to guide me. 

Maybe my realization isn't so much that there ARE detours but that there are REASONS for the detours. They aren't as random as they appear.

I may be heading toward potholes big enough to do real damage. I have discovered this truth when I've insisted on ignoring the signs. Proverbs 14:12 says: "There is a way which seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death."

And Proverbs 16:9 instructs: "The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps."  Sometimes, I'm in such a rut, going the same way day after day, that my route needs a fresh view.  

A view that's unexpected and beautiful...maybe even life-changing.

It may be that I was never supposed to reach my intended destination at all.

As I contemplate some of the major detours in my life, I realize that each one brought me to a better place. Every exciting opportunity that has come my way has been an unforeseen detour from the road I was on, from the destination I had in mind.

Conversely, when the detour signs were ignored...when I grabbed the wheel for all it was worth and plowed ahead in spite of warnings, I got stuck in the mud, ran off the road or in some way or another, found myself in trouble. 

The good news is, God has always been gracious to bring me back to the road he wanted me on.

Have you been detoured?

Maybe you didn't get the job you thought was "perfect" for you. Or into your first choice of school - or second or third. Perhaps something that appeared to be working out, didn't - a business deal, a relationship, a bid on your dream house. 

Don't stare at the roadblock. Don't high tail it back home and abandon your journey.

Follow the detour and see where it leads.

It may take a little longer than you'd like. It may look like you're heading deeper into the woods.  But if God puts up a detour sign, He'll get you where you need to be, because it's where He wants you to be. Don't fight the detour...enjoy the ride!

God-sized dreams link up

Thoughts on Achievement

Achievement.  A noun.  Definition: something accomplished, especially by superior ability, special effort, great courage, etc. 

Next month, I will receive an award.  The "Mercer County Woman of Achievement" award, given in recognition of my work in the community.  At least, I'm sure that's what the committee who reviewed the nomination thinks they are celebrating.  But even as I write "my work" I know that is not true.  

Once I got over the shock of the news, I began thinking about what it meant to be a "woman of achievement."  What had I done really?  I asked that question, not out of a sense of false humility, but of heartfelt sincerety, and this is what came to mind...

Nothing is achieved apart from God. If the work I oversee in my position as outreach ministry head was not in His will, with His blessing, it would not flourish.  God gave the vision and is faithful to complete the work He started.  All praise and glory and honor go to Him and Him alone.  Proverbs 19:21 says:  “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand.”

Nothing is achieved alone.  I sit under the tutelage of pastors who "get it."  They know the church is not a building that serves as an exclusive club.  It is a body of believers who need to act on the command to love your neighbor as yourself.  And God has surrounded me with a team of people who have a servants' heart. Their passion for people and compassion for their circumstances is evident in all they do.  They share a vision for doing practical acts of service with no strings attached.  We are motivated to serve just to let others see God's love in action. 

God can use anything and anyone to accomplish His purposes.  Two and a half years ago, when God first burdened my heart with the idea of the outreach ministry, I went to my senior pastor. I clearly remember saying to him "I'm not a leader. I'm an encourager. I'll do whatever someone tells me to do, but I don't want to be chief in charge of anything." I had nothing in my arsenal that defined "achievement". No superior ability (or training of any kind), no special effort, and certainly not great courage - I wanted to hide behind someone else who would take the lead. 

Even further back, almost six years now, God not only spared my job but created an unlikely partnership.  I knew I was slated to be part of a down-sizing and was shocked to find my name had been removed from the list in the 11th hour.  Through a series of circumstances too numerous to detail here (although they are all part of a book I'm working on) I began attending my current church, began heading up the outreach ministry there, and found a benefactor for several of our projects in the owner of my company.  When I think back on that down-sizing incident, the words "for such a time as this" jump to mind.  I'm sure the owner had no idea how he and his money would be used by God several years down the road.

So what is my achievement?  My "something accomplished?"  Those words indicate a job finished, and there is still much to be done.  But, if I'm in the process of achieving anything, it is becoming a vessel for God to work through.  I am not "chief in charge of anything."  God is in control.  And when I become a willing vessel, when I "achieve" laying down my pride and getting out of the way, He is free to use my strengths of being an encourager.  I am free to serve Him the way He's gifted me, by "rallying the troops".  Habakkuk 2:1-2 says :  "I will take my stand at my watchpost and station myself on the tower, and look out to see what he will say to me, and what I will answer concerning my complaint. And the Lord answered me: 'Write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it.'" 

So on November 8th, I will accept the award with my name on it, but I hope I am given the opportunity to set the record straight.  To share with those in attendance that God is the one to be honored.  That anything accomplished through us and sometimes even in spite of us, is not because of us...it is because of Him and His love for us. 

The Power of Words

I'm making hamburgers for lunch.  As the meat sizzles in the pan, my almost 22  year old son says to me "making monkey brain sandwiches?"

"What?" 

"I don't remember much from childhood" he continues "but I remember you once told me ground beef was monkey brains - that's why I won't eat it."

This is a revelation to me.  I don't ever in my life recall making that reference.  Ever.  But he is insistent.  So, maybe he's right.  Maybe I joked about it never thinking that it would cause such a strong reaction in him.

As someone who loves words I thought I was very aware of what these little symbols on a page can do.  My "love language" is words of affirmation, so I know when you express words audibly, with emotion and inflection behind them, they have even greater power to bring joy or sorrow, healing or pain.

It's one of the reasons why, when this same son and I used to share a computer, he would groan if he wanted to use it and I was already on.

"What's the matter?  I'll be off in a minute...I'm just writing a quick email."

"There is no such thing as a quick email for you" he'd complain.  "You don't just write them, you write and re-write!"

In fact, that's true.  A friend of mine says I don't write emails so much as 'craft' them.  I try to be thorough and clear since there are no verbal cues to indicate intent.

It's so easy to take words and how we use them for granted. 

I lead a prayer group once a month. We're reading and discussing "Too Busy Not To Pray" by Bill Hybels.  This past week, there was a section entitled "Mean What We Say."  He talks about using 'sanctified jargon' while praying, saying that many may not even think about the implications of what they are saying. 

He gives this example "Dear Lord, please be with me as I go on this new job interview" or "be with me as I go on this trip."  When you first hear it, the request sounds holy.  Unfortunately, it doesn't make sense.  I'm often tempted to ask the one who is praying, "why do you ask God to do what he is already doing?"  In Matthew 28:20 Jesus says, "Surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."  In Hebrews 13:5, God says, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."  ...One of Jesus' names, Emmanuel, means "God with us."  We don't need to ask God to be with us if we are members of his family.  Instead we need to pray that we will be aware of his presence, that we will be confident because of it."  Seems so obvious when he puts it that way, doesn't it?  But I'm sure we've all been guilty of something similar.

The Bible has much to say on the power of words.  Proverbs especially dedicates many verses to the subject. 13:3 warns "He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin."  16:34 instructs "Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones." and 18:21 says "The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit." There are are many more examples, but I'm sure you get the idea...words can be a weapon or a healing salve...or in the case of what I'm assuming must have been a teasing, off-the-cuff remark, they have the power to alter how someone else views things, good or bad.

So here's my challenge to you today.  Think before you speak.  Whether or not your conversation is emotionally charged, your words have a lasting effect on others.  Use them to encourage, teach and uplift.  And never, ever tell a kid that ground beef is really monkey brains LOL!