The Least of These - Offering Warmth in the Dead of Winter

Today I'm honored to have my story "The Least of These" featured at Circles of Faith. 

If you've had enough of the cold and the snow, can you imagine what it's been like for the homeless? 

This weekend, a number of folks from my church will be headed to the Salvation Army Drop In Center in Trenton, New Jersey to serve a meal and hand out some warm hats, socks and blankets.  I pray this story inspires you to go out into your own communities and make a difference...

Throughout the evening, the snow had silently fallen, blanketing everything under six inches of pristine whiteness.  Most people had made what my friend calls their “French toast run” – the obligatory dash for bread, milk, and eggs.  When morning broke bright and clear, my urban neighborhood was uncharacteristically quiet.

I slept until the cat pawed my face for her morning meal. Once she was fed, I put the tea kettle on and sat at the dining room table to read my Bible.  It wasn't long before the sounds of metal scraping concrete filled the air as people dug out.  click to continue

The Back Story

Over at God-sized Dreams they're talking about the back story to their God-sized dream this week.




Mine started with rejection.  

No, I wasn't the least popular kid in school.

In fact, I'm probably one of the few who actually enjoyed high school.

I ran track and played field hockey.

I was in the chorus, advanced chorus and drama clubs.  I even won first place for a duet I sang with my now Broadway actor friend in the "Cultural Olympics" - the artsy kid's answer to competition at my very sports-oriented high school.

I was National Honor Society.  I was 10th in my class of 440.

I was an achiever.  And, I was a believer.

But...I had absolutely no self-confidence whatsoever because I put my trust and faith in a person who always belittled my achievements.  And then I married him.

Why do some of our greatest hurts come from the very people who should offer protection?

After years of negativity spoken over me, I was convinced I was no one, with nothing to offer.

Eventually, I sought solace in the church.  I put my faith and trust into doing things.  I began by organizing a women's retreat.  After approaching someone to ask why we hadn't had one in several years, I was handed a stack of folders and told to "have at it".

Anyone who's ever coordinated a women's retreat will truly appreciate this...in less than six months, I found a location, a speaker, put together an agenda, and signed up 50 or so women.  Success, right?

No!!

Instead of appreciation, I was bombarded by complaints about the speaker, the content, the meals, you name it.

Why do some of our greatest hurts come from within the very place that should offer healing?

I came home from that retreat scarred and defeated.  So much so, that the following year, when I once again led the retreat team, my unsaved husband said "Why would you do that to yourself?  They ate you alive last year!"  Even he saw what the experience had done to me.

I wish I could say that rejection ended there.  But life is not perfect.  People are not perfect.  The church is not perfect.

Still, there is a difference in my life today.  When rejection comes, it does not mean all is lost.  Joel 2:25 says "So I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the crawling locust, the consuming locust, and the chewing locust, my great army which I sent among you."

What I now realize is that although painful, each experience, each rejection, moved me on to something or someplace else.  And with each new thing, another piece of the puzzle fit into place.  My faith and trust is now in God alone.  Rejection has led to restoration.  And restoration has equipped me to begin living a God-sized dream.

What has God used in your life to equip you for His purposes?  I'd love to hear your story in the comments...

Adventures in Community Outreach - Growing Roots

I can still remember sitting in the office, talking to two of my pastors.

"But how will this be different?" one asked.

It was a valid question.  I had been part of a ministry that reached out to a local homeless shelter for women and children.  Initially, we were successful in bringing half a dozen women to the church each Sunday in our church van.  When they moved into their own housing around town, we used a second van to do a loop around the city to pick them up for services and special events.

The first van continued heading to the shelter, week in and week out for over 18 months with no results. During that same time, many of the regulars on the second van became sporadic in attendance, dropping out one by one for a variety of reasons.  The drivers and ministry leadership were discouraged and eventually, van service to the shelter stopped and that ministry was shut down.

Now here I was, a few short months later telling them I felt very strongly that God was telling me to go out into the community.  Their concern was understandable.

"I know it sounds crazy, but honestly, God just won't leave me alone about this."

I explained how a book they had given me at a leadership meeting had said some things that really started me thinking.  It talked about not reinventing the wheel.  Taking the volunteer base of your church and partnering with organizations already doing good works in the community. 

"It's different because this time we'll be like a clearing house of ideas.  We'll match community needs with congregational gifts...and we won't put all our eggs in one basket like we did last time."

I tried to speak with the certainty of my convictions, but in truth, all I knew was that I had tried to brush aside the voice several times, but it always came back again, stronger than before. 

I've written other posts about starting with a food drive, moving beyond our walls to refurbish a "Dress for Success" office, and eventually, doing a makeover for Preservation House, a local shelter.

While doors closed at the women's shelter just a year before, they seemed to swing wide open at Preservation House.

I had never heard of Preservation House until one of those ladies from the van, one who had continued to come to our church, found herself in need of assistance again and landed there.

Right away, this place captured our hearts.  As the congregation took part in the "Adopt a Room" outreach at "PH" as we call it, we got to know some of the families and we followed up with a meal at Thanksgiving and a party at Christmas. We wanted to foster relationships with these families and begin to grow roots at the facility.  To that end, we started a "welcome basket" ministry.  The residents who leave for their own housing get a laundry basket filled with kitchen, bathroom and heath and beauty products to get them started in their new homes.  A Bible and info on the church are included as one last way to reach out and make a connection before they leave the shelter.


In June, during our Central Cares Day outreach, we included PH as one of our work sites, creating an inviting waiting room for visitors, teen room complete with cool seating, fuzzy pillows and flat screen tv and a resource room with tons of books and table space for studying.


But back when we did that first makeover in 2010, God planted a new dream in my heart.  To bring a life skills training course to the residents of the house.  I saw how small changes in their lifestyle could make better use of their meager resources.  So much money was wasted using check cashing services instead of maintaining a checking account.  Food stamps used at the local drug store for groceries could stretch 2 or 3 times as far if they shopped at a food store and used coupons.  I was sure there were other areas where small steps could make big changes too.

I had the dream, but had no idea how to execute it.  I talked to different people about it - one of our contacts at the Salvation Army said he had a program they used, but somehow, we never connected.  I'd bring it up in our planning meetings now and again, and although everyone agreed it was a great idea, still, no plan emerged.

Then one night at a women's Bible study, something happened.  The study was a video series on the book of Jonah and featured Priscilla Shirer, who talked about whether things that come up in our lives are interruptions, or divine interventions.  Priscilla offered the idea that an "interruption" is actually God's invitation to do something beyond our wildest dreams.  When Jonah was willing to allow God to interrupt his life, the result was revival in an entire city!   At the end of the study, Priscilla encouraged those taking part to find their Nineveh and make a difference.

As we discussed possible ideas, I mentioned my dream of a Life Skills class for PH.  One woman in the class came to me and said "I wrote a program like that for my master's thesis...maybe we could bring it to PH."

I asked the pastors to review the program and they gave it a thumbs up. Then I sent the outline to the social worker at the shelter...she liked it.  It has taken the better part of a year since then, but it is obvious that it is God's perfect timing.

The program consists of 8 modules in 3 sections.  Subjects include parental involvement in your child's school, building a network of support, discovering community resources, resume writing, learning about the importance of credit and basic banking, and creating a budget.  The most amazing thing was watching God move just the right people into place to teach each of these classes...the retired principal, the VP of a financial company, employees of the state welfare department, someone who facilitates "Financial Peace University" in our church.  From just one brainstorming meeting for names of people to reach out to for training, we got 90% of our staff.

Although I'm not a church staff member, I am invited to the annual calendar planning meeting since the ministry I head up impacts the entire congregation.  None of the staff had any idea how much progress had been made and who had volunteered to be faculty.  The looks of wonder and amazement around the table as they read over my notes, made my day.

On September 23, 2013, almost 3 years after God gave me the dream, I watched it come to fruition. 12 women attended the first ever Life Skills seminar.

Each person received their own "kit".  A binder with a notebook, one pocket folder (to hold the many informational brochures gathered), a pen, calculator (they'll be creating a budget during the last week), a coupon holder and a 2 year planner.

We were so encouraged by the interest and interaction of our "students". They were engaged, supportive of each other's comments, and genuinely seemed happy to be there.

The exit survey we gave them came back with wonderful feedback, many rating their experience "excellent" and all said they would recommend it to others and be back again the following week.  Also exciting was how many women freely took a Bible - in fact, several who missed taking one from the information table came running after us in the parking lot to get one before we left.

Even more amazing was the phone call I had with the shelter administration this week.  I called to find out the head count for this coming Monday and to determine if childcare was needed.

"I'm so glad you called, Miss Toni!  The two houses we run for men will now be open all day and Dr. Johnson wants to know if you can bring the same kind of programs to the men."

We suggested a Bible study, mentoring, life skills training and a Celebrate Recovery class and the response from shelter administration was "just gather the dates and let's start planning to get you in here."

How will this time be different?

It is night and day.

It is beyond my wildest dreams.  God closed doors so we would head to more fertile ground.  Roots are taking hold.  We pray lives will be changed, and how can they not be when God is so obviously the one working all things together?

Eph. 3:20-21 "God can do anything, you know-far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams!  He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.  Glory to God in the church!  Glory to God in the Messiah, In Jesus!  Glory down all the generations!  Glory through all millennia!  Oh, yes!" (The Message)

Adventures in Community Outreach - A Day of Service

In addition to my full-time job as Creative Services Director for a radio station, I serve as the Director of Community Connections, the local outreach ministry of my church, Central: a Christ-centered church.  If you're a regular reader of this blog, you know that occasionally I write a new entry for the series - "Adventures in Community Outreach".  These posts detail just a few of the different outreaches my church has held over the years, in hopes that you may become inspired to do something similar to reach your community.

Last June, we held a Free Market on our grounds to help those who recently transitioned into their own home from a shelter situation, or who were struggling financially and needed household items.  It was a tremendous undertaking and touched about 300 lives, but we decided it's something to carry out every few years, not annually.  

That meant we needed a new idea this June.  I spent many months praying about what that would look like, and kept coming up empty.  Because my desire was to have our next outreach take place in the community and not on our grounds, we considered doing a health fair at a church we work with in the city.  But although I thought it was the right direction, several doors closed and it was necessary to go back to the drawing board.  That made me very nervous because we had a date of June 1st set aside, and March was rapidly approaching.  One day I may learn that my timing is not God's divine timing!

Because these church-wide outreaches tend to garner 150 - 200 volunteers, I had been stuck on finding a vehicle large enough to accommodate that size group.  Slowly, through a number of encounters, God shifted my thinking, and "Central Cares Day" was born.

Central Cares Day will take place June 1st from 9 til noon.  Groups of 5, 10, or 20 people will meet for a time of prayer and encouragement before going out to perform practical acts of service at the 16 sites we've identified throughout our county:

The Salvation Army, Habitat for Humanity, Mercer Street Friends (a food bank), Choice One (a crisis pregnancy center), The Arc Mercer County (a group home), Morris Hall (a nursing home), CareTrenton.org (a group dedicated to cleaning the streets of Trenton), UIH (strengthens families by working with dads), Henry J. Austin (a health clinic), Cadwalader Learning Center, 3 homeless shelters, 3 elementary schools. and 2 community centers.

The help we will provide will be as diverse as the organizations themselves...from art projects and entertainment, to housekeeping and administrative work, from light landscaping and serving a meal to painting and repairs.  Besides wanting to positively impact our community by putting hands and feet on our faith, we sought out things that could be done by a variety of ages and abilities so that all who wanted to participate, could.  We have several locations where families even with young children can participate together, some appropriate for 12 and up and some that are for adults 18+. 

The logistics have boiled down to this...each location will provide a contact person who will be onsite while we're working, and we will identify a team leader on our end for each project.  In this way, communication can be established prior to the work being done.  The group can go in fully prepared to perform the task at hand.

An army of volunteers - 291 - will be needed for Central Cares Day.  But if your church has a smaller congregation you can still organize something similar.  Simply begin with fewer sites, or, as I hope will occur in years to come with our "Cares Day", organize several churches in your area to work together to achieve the goal!

One of the other exciting facets of this outreach is how we plan to wind things up.  After all the groups have served at their site for the 3 hours, they will gather back together at our church where we will have a time of testimony and fellowship over a picnic lunch.  So often when we hold these large outreaches, we know what has happened in our little section of the event, but we don't hear all the other stories and encounters.  We usually pull together a video of stills, but it's not the same.  By coming together for a meal and time of sharing, we will get to learn how God has taken each one of these small outreaches to create a large impact all over our county.  

Of course, in order to have all this happen, we need a few more teams of volunteers behind the scenes - my ministry team is invaluable in putting together the details, helping sign up volunteers, and more, we need those willing to prep and serve the food, set up and take down  the meal portion of the event, provide childcare for the smaller children who can't help, and most importantly, a prayer team who covers the entire event in prayer!

We are already being blessed as several organizations have sought to meet to discuss an ongoing partnership with our church.  And then there are those crazy little detail Godincidences like the yard sale where I found 82 pairs of work gloves for a fraction of the regular price.

Volunteer signups begin this coming weekend, so stay tuned for updates as Central Cares Day approaches.  I'm sure there will be many God-sightings along the way!!

I Am A Lego

Yes, that kind of Lego...a small, unassuming building piece that isn't functional unless it's used as part of the bigger creation. A piece whose sole purpose is to connect things - or in my case, people - to one another.

I've often mentioned in my posts about the God-sized dream given to me January 10, 2010.  It was a burden He put on my heart to see my church move beyond the walls of a building to BE the church in the midst of our community.

God has taken that dream and given it wings. Our numbers grow as people are attracted to a body of believers who have put feet on their faith. And some blessed as recipients of one outreach have joined us to go out and be the blessing the next time around. I am just in awe of the way God delivers...bigger and better than I can imagine, every time.

I've said it before...I am constantly seeing Eph. 3:20-21 in action.

New Year's Eve I sat with a group of women talking about our latest outreach and ministry in general. One woman has led a Bible study for 9 years that's grown to over 70 women. She mentioned an overseeing organization committed to getting leaders equipped and trained. Then someone asked me "and you've learned to run your ministry how?" We all laughed as another woman piped up "trial by fire."

While it hasn't been as painful as all that, my team and I are still on a learning curve. We have no "formal" training, but I can't help but think our lack of experience allows God to be creative and unrestricted by preconceived expectations. We are not careless in our approach, but there are always many unknowns. The beauty is that God is gracious and when things are done with a right heart, He works it all together and is glorified in the outcome.

It's been my experience that God uses my natural gifts of curiosity, friendliness, communication and helpfulness, and spiritual gifts of leadership and encouragement, to connect people with needs. There is great joy and satisfaction in having an organization we've worked with - or better yet, one who has only heard of what we're doing in the community - contact me to see if we can help...or to have people call me because they want to plug into something and make a difference. As I talk to people about my passion for what we're doing and how God is using us, it has opened many doors and offered many connection opportunities. 

In truth, each of us can be a Lego.  Just like the pieces in a kit, we come in many shapes, sizes and colors.  Left to our own devices, we would sit in a pile and never create anything. But when we allow the Master Builder to use our strengths and abilities, when we open ourselves up to reaching out to others, He connects us all together and creates amazing, awe-inspiring things!

Won't you be a Lego this year?

Thoughts on Achievement

Achievement.  A noun.  Definition: something accomplished, especially by superior ability, special effort, great courage, etc. 

Next month, I will receive an award.  The "Mercer County Woman of Achievement" award, given in recognition of my work in the community.  At least, I'm sure that's what the committee who reviewed the nomination thinks they are celebrating.  But even as I write "my work" I know that is not true.  

Once I got over the shock of the news, I began thinking about what it meant to be a "woman of achievement."  What had I done really?  I asked that question, not out of a sense of false humility, but of heartfelt sincerety, and this is what came to mind...

Nothing is achieved apart from God. If the work I oversee in my position as outreach ministry head was not in His will, with His blessing, it would not flourish.  God gave the vision and is faithful to complete the work He started.  All praise and glory and honor go to Him and Him alone.  Proverbs 19:21 says:  “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the LORD that will stand.”

Nothing is achieved alone.  I sit under the tutelage of pastors who "get it."  They know the church is not a building that serves as an exclusive club.  It is a body of believers who need to act on the command to love your neighbor as yourself.  And God has surrounded me with a team of people who have a servants' heart. Their passion for people and compassion for their circumstances is evident in all they do.  They share a vision for doing practical acts of service with no strings attached.  We are motivated to serve just to let others see God's love in action. 

God can use anything and anyone to accomplish His purposes.  Two and a half years ago, when God first burdened my heart with the idea of the outreach ministry, I went to my senior pastor. I clearly remember saying to him "I'm not a leader. I'm an encourager. I'll do whatever someone tells me to do, but I don't want to be chief in charge of anything." I had nothing in my arsenal that defined "achievement". No superior ability (or training of any kind), no special effort, and certainly not great courage - I wanted to hide behind someone else who would take the lead. 

Even further back, almost six years now, God not only spared my job but created an unlikely partnership.  I knew I was slated to be part of a down-sizing and was shocked to find my name had been removed from the list in the 11th hour.  Through a series of circumstances too numerous to detail here (although they are all part of a book I'm working on) I began attending my current church, began heading up the outreach ministry there, and found a benefactor for several of our projects in the owner of my company.  When I think back on that down-sizing incident, the words "for such a time as this" jump to mind.  I'm sure the owner had no idea how he and his money would be used by God several years down the road.

So what is my achievement?  My "something accomplished?"  Those words indicate a job finished, and there is still much to be done.  But, if I'm in the process of achieving anything, it is becoming a vessel for God to work through.  I am not "chief in charge of anything."  God is in control.  And when I become a willing vessel, when I "achieve" laying down my pride and getting out of the way, He is free to use my strengths of being an encourager.  I am free to serve Him the way He's gifted me, by "rallying the troops".  Habakkuk 2:1-2 says :  "I will take my stand at my watchpost and station myself on the tower, and look out to see what he will say to me, and what I will answer concerning my complaint. And the Lord answered me: 'Write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it.'" 

So on November 8th, I will accept the award with my name on it, but I hope I am given the opportunity to set the record straight.  To share with those in attendance that God is the one to be honored.  That anything accomplished through us and sometimes even in spite of us, is not because of us...it is because of Him and His love for us. 

A Journey Through Time: Finding Purpose In Him

So there's this thing called "Random Journal Day".  I was made aware of it a week ago by my friend Dawn at Beneath the Surface, and invited to participate.  I thought about it for days, knowing that many, many entries were of such an intensely personal nature on one particular subject, that it wouldn't be of much help or interest to anyone other than myself to see where the road has led. 

Tonight, I finally sat down and began leafing through page upon page of hand-written thoughts, prayers and emotions.  As I remembered, there was an inordinate amount of logging on a situation that will remain between me, God and those journal pages.  Perhaps if there's ever a day when it works itself out, I'll share the journey to the resolution, but not today.

Today, I share an entry from June 4, 2007.  I had been separated for 5 months, had gone from leading worship at a church of 2,000 to one with a congregation of 20, and had recently escaped a downsizing at work but was putting in 16 hour days. In the midst of all this change and upset, I was reading through Rick Warren's Purpose Driven Life.  Each day had a Bible verse and a question posed.  This particular day the verse I read was Colossians 1:16b "Everything got started in Him and finds its purpose in Him."

The question posed  was this:  "In spite of all the advertising around me, how can I remind myself that life is really about living for God, not myself?"

Herein lies the irony...my profession is that of commercial writer for a radio station.  It is, in fact, my job to convince people that life is indeed all about them.  That they have a need for a service or product that must be met, and that they are worthy and deserving of satisfying that need. 

The response I logged was:  "An interesting question given the 'purpose' of my current profession.  And given all the 'me' questions swirling in my head lately - 'what should I do about my job, my marriage, my church?'  It seems it would all be so much easier to stop thinking about me and concentrate on God.  Not that the questions will disappear, but maybe the answers will come once things are in the proper perspective.  So how DO I remind myself that it's about living for God?  When I sing at Journey (my church at the time) I look out at just 20 people in the congregation, but I'm enjoying leading in worship - I know it's for God - there's no glory in singing in front of such a small group, yet I'm still content to do it.  It's from the heart and an act of worship, it's not about me - and that's a good thing...I believe I'm using the gifts He gave me, which is pleasing to Him, but I'm not sure whether they're being used for His purpose for my life.  


I know one answer to the question posed - and probably to several of my own - is that reading my Bible and meditating on what it says as well as daily prayer will help me to remember it's about God and what HE wants to do with me...and not about what I want.  I've gotten what I want before and it led to heartache.  I just need to be willing to put down those desires I think I want and need to be willing to wait and see if it's what He has for me...what will fulfill that purpose?  Will I reconcile?  Remain single?  Find new love?  Pressing questions for me, that when held up in the light of eternity, are so very unimportant.  What is important is how I react, act and handle those situations as they unfold.  The world is watching how Christians behave - they need to see Jesus in me and not me struggling for control over Jesus.  In the end, I want to be like Paul and count it all joy - the trials, the hardships and the good times because they all form who I am and how I interact with my Lord.


Lord, you have promised to take care of me, telling me to be anxious for nothing.  So once again, I make a conscious effort to lay down my fears, concerns, uncertainties and desires, knowing you are sufficient to supply all my needs and that you will never leave me or forsake me - and I in turn will strive to live for you."

Almost 5 years later I have some answers to those 'me' questions I grappled with as well as a new found purpose.  I've been divorced for about a year and a half.  While I know that God hates the dissolution of the marriage vow, there were reasons present which 'covered' the decision to end the union.  I am a healthier, happier, more effective person because of it.  I still don't know if God's will for me is to remain single or if He has a new relationship in my future, but I know that His timing is perfect.  The church I now call home is not the one I was in 5 years ago with just 20 members, however that tiny church plant was the place where I was introduced to my life's purpose.  Community outreach was a huge part of who they were as a congregation and I quickly realized that it was something that spoke to my heart in a powerful way.  I now head up a ministry at my new church called CommunityConnections.  I'm at the same job, but have the help I so desperately needed after the downsizing.  In fact, that job has provided contacts and blessings to help further the work of the outreach ministry.  I've walked through a lot of highs and lows in 5 years, but the Lord has been faithful to His promises to always care and provide for me and He has never left me...and I continue to strive to live for Him.